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Levels of uncertainty — that is, neither agreeing nor disagreeing — about various sexual practices and attitudes are elevated among Christians.When we asked more than 15,000 Americans about sexual ethics, many who attended religious services at least once a week were on the fence. One can interpret those on the fence as movable — open to being convinced.

Long-standing Christian sexual ethics are making less and less sense to the unchurched — a key market for evangelicals.

Add to that Christians’ elevated standards for marriage and you have a recipe for wholesale retreat. It’s an expression of love for same-sex attracted people.’ ] Young Christians are suffering the bruising effects of participating in the same wider mating market as the rest of the country.

In step, many Christians’ expectations about marriage have dimmed. Many Orthodox Jews and Mormons have eschewed the wider mating market, while Christians in their 20s and 30s have not. Sex often follows, though sometimes after a longer period of time — a pattern that confuses them more than most, because premarital sex remains actively discouraged, but impossible to effectively prevent, in the church. Online dating treats human beings as rank-able commodities and speeds up our ability to circulate through them.

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